Saturday, February 10, 2007
Feelin' kinda depressed.. kept repeating the song Run by snow patrol and Zhuan Shu Tian Shi by Tank over and over again in my mp3. both of the songs really made it really hard for me to control my feelings. i cant help but remind myself of the past and so i've thought that i've gotten over it already, i saw him today. again. and adding on to it, today was obc paper. really gna repeat this shitty module again.
Was really hard to smile and laugh and all.. but thanks to my best friend, youTube, and of course, caryn n davin, if not i wouldnt be strong enough to overcome this.. nicole asked me a question that really kept me thinking. since i still love him alot, why would i wana break in the first place? hah. i dont know how to reply her. we were meant tobe. supposed to be. but we lost it. all the bad stuff just slipped off my mind and i found myself with no excuses but the fact that he was really a good boyfriend.
I feel stupid. Hah. like, what's the point crying over split milk right? haha. anyways, i just need a release of emotions. but, if there's ever a day where he has found a new partner, i don't know what i'll do.. seriously. i guess i'll feel really sad.. but thats ok i guess. i should be happy=)
Sometimes, i really don't wana give him the impression that i'm really happy now. yes i am. but only to a certain extent. i don't want him to think that i'm fine without him. i really dont want him to stop loving me and all. from his smile today i think that day is coming, where everything stops. yeah, i'm a selfish bitch. whatever. 2 years is really hard to forget.
The song, Zhuan Shu Tian Shi.. thats my favourite song ever. i really wanted somebody that i really liked to sing it to me. that'll be really sweet. i can literarily die in his arms. not wu zun this time. haha. but guess itsnot gna happen this valentines huh. Hah. so much for my happy ending.. =)